Giving peace a chance: Munday Monologues
I’ve realized that the world and everything in it is not enough to keep you happy. Because we are constantly bound by expectations and oh dear Lord “our feelings”, we are utterly and stupidly quite bound. True happiness comes from freedom. And, freedom is to be able to think, say, do, and live as you please without the limitations or construct of any threads of control. Controlling agents could be expectations, ambition, wants, needs, the grandeur of love — the whole shebang.
How does one become utterly blissful, without a shred of deviation? I used to think there was utopia in enlightenment. However, the truly enlightened one experiences the rollercoaster of emotions but has risen above them to “choose” what fits him/her in the present moment. To be equanimous and neutral while being in a state of complete passion for life and all that you do — is the key to true bliss. Running away, hiding, and suppressing emotions is not the way. The truly wise are the ones who stay calm in the storm of internal and external life.
That leads us to the next dilemma:
How does one rise above emotions? The closest we get is a deep-rooted belief that all the drama (internal and external) is temporary, with no true value in the bigger picture of existence, and that it’s possible to snap out of the spiraling loopholes of this vicious emotional trap. To experience the experience without actually submitting to the experience completely, while being present totally. That fine line of participating but not allowing it to have any effect on your inner state is possibly the way to channelize this Godly state of being. Also, reiterating, like a broken record, that there is nobody perfect in the world to rescue you or give you love as per what you expect. Accepting the flawed universe with its imperfections in all forms, complete acceptance of every living being, can also help you not get affected when they obviously don’t fit your expectations. To put yourself out there without an iota of fear, to accept people for who they are, and not allowing their words or actions to deter your inner sanctity — is profound. Imagine the level of practice and disassociation one needs before reaching that state! To love and not expect in return is possibly one of the most selfless acts any human can commit. To be able to choose the right emotion in any circumstance that leads to the right response is what makes a truly great being. To be able to stand alone — bearing all adulation and mockery, love and judgment, bliss and strife — knowing that this will pass and choosing to be peaceful within, is true greatness. If you can master being calm and peaceful irrespective of what happens within you or outside of you, you are a true genius of the world, you have attained magical powers, a wizard almost. Rise above, rise above..
But, how does one remain peaceful at all times? Finding little true joys in your everyday life that makes your heart and state of being joyous is a sure shot way. Make a list, ensure you repeat what’s on this list. The brain operates at a level that the Gods also cannot control without any magical elixir or occult spells, so it’s all on you to tame it and/or distract it. Finding these little joys will trick your brain into snapping out of vicious unnecessary negative emotions. Learning to distract your mind is the best way to trick it. The bane of the mind is the power it has to lead you to believe that the thoughts you have are all true. Thoughts gain meaning only if you believe them! If you believe that you are a success, then you are a success, if you believe you are a failure, then you are a failure! It’s not the thought that matters, thoughts will always arise, like bullets in a war, but what thoughts you selectively choose to believe in is what will determine your state of mind, finally determining your state of being. Being able to filter the chaff from the wheat and choosing appropriate responses to yourself and to others automatically creates a sense of control and foundationally sets the ground for peace. It is only from your thoughts, your reality is created. “What you think, you become — The Buddha”. Another hack is to allow time to pass before responding. A 10-second rule, or 20-second rule for the flary ones, will help in heated situations. Pause for effect, if you might, mentally! There is no rush for a response. Because in this 10–20 second gap, your shitty thoughts almost 100% related to your ego will pass and will change the level of intensity in your mind. Whoever the genius was who said “Think before you talk”, hell I would rephrase that to, “Pause, rethink, respond”. The third way I’ve learned off late to be more peaceful no matter what happens is to be deeply relaxed. Through meditation, one can achieve this state of absolute inner clarity and zero traces of anxiety. To deeply relax your whole self, to let go of all worry, fear, and expectation, to bring yourself to do only what’s right, and breathing through it all in a slow, meaningful way, like every breath matters — will lead to deep relaxation — making you automatically peaceful. “Peace is the bi-product of deep relaxation”.
To reiterate a billion times with a single-pointed focus that everything around me is temporary, so why the drama, is my mantra this Munday.
