The Hush-Life Syndrome
We are all products of conditioning, wiring, patterns and the likes. The reason behind the way we act, the words we say, our life choices and even the partners we choose stems from our subconscious and our inherent belief systems.
We live in a judgmental world, where who we are is constantly pitted against this threshold of what is right and wrong. This standard — sometimes invisible sometimes not — of what is accepted and what is not, very much exists. And, as a society we are grown judging everything and everyone around us. Our entire ecosystems are driven on comparison which is what social media thrives on. A taboo world that fights taboos but still lives it, quite ignorantly.
There are tons of misbeliefs that exist in our day-to-day lives which is so deeply rooted and utterly wrong, yet, there is nobody who can change it. We are stuck in this loop hole of unhealthy patterns of living that play out time and again in our lives only bringing us down mentally. In a world where expression of self is supposed to be easy with so many mediums to do so, we find ourselves living different versions of our own selves trying to prove a point to all those people we do not even care about. If vanity could be at its peak, the environment we are a part of today is most conducive for its existence. Most justified too.
One such belief that has caused me to ponder over many nights has been this whole way of living life by suppressing sadness. The true reality of our emotions has no healthy outlet except for a good support system of friends and family, and for the evolved ones — a good therapist. But, for any average person to express their sadness — they are thoroughly judged. “Laugh and the world laughs with you, cry and you cry alone” is possibly the most apt quote depicting this state. And, why is it so? Why is “happiness” as a concept given so much impetus, while “sadness” treated as it’s adopted orphan? Why is happiness glorified while sadness absolutely disdained? Aren’t both of these emotions just emotions and need each other to define the meaning of the other? Will you know the meaning of happiness if sadness didn’t exist? Will you understand the difference between light and dark or good and evil if the opposite didn’t exist? This is the reason why we see so many depressed souls in a world where expression of self through social media is just a click away, but the outlet of sadness doesn’t exist, the outlet for the real you is non-existent. This is what I call The Hush Life Syndrome.
You hush your way through life. Hush your real feelings, hush your hurt, hush your rights at the workplace, hush your rights in a relationship, hush your opinions trying to “fit in”. With all the hushing, we have created this bubble of life. This vulnerable, delicate bubble that can so easily be broken if one does not fit in, and of course its inevitable that this bubble will be broken because we live in a real world! A real world where sadness exists — life is not perfect to walk around posing in bubbles. There will be umpteen situations that will burst your bubble, but how you blow back up and float around again is your fortitude. While we aim for the stars, we need to accept that the journey to space is filled with threats, disappointment and a lot of effort! It is sad to see that sadness is condemned and needs to be hidden because the world will not understand it, in spite of knowing that each of us go through the same emotion.
If the world was perfect, each one of us would not feel threatened to be who we are even in our lowest moments. We would not feel the need to put on a fake smile and say “I’m ok”, when in reality you are dying a slow death. Sadness and kindness go hand-in-hand. If the world accepted sadness and pain and celebrated it — we would find kinder people. People would automatically lend a crying shoulder and a hearing heart to comfort the ones in the low. We would understand the true meaning of upliftment and embrace reality. Designer brands and luxury might suffer, but perhaps give a more real message and create more environment friendly products. The whole façade of “fake it till you make it” would cease to exist. The world would run on compassion and not comparison.
Happiness is the goal but sadness is a part of the same happiness, they are all but emotions waiting to be embraced, experienced and dealt with. These are just states of the human mind that so easily gets carried away. If only, we learnt to treat them equally and with more open mindedness. If only “You laugh and cry, and the world is there for you”, could be the rephrased quote to live by.
Don’t hush your tears and don’t be afraid of expressing your true self, for the ones who truly care will be kind to you and accept you even at your lowest, along with you in your happiest.
I say “Hush”, to the Hush-Life Syndrome.